America’s birthday pool is beautiful. Nobody hates loving it more than Trump’s haters.

In the beginning, there was a pool. It was green, and broken, and hemorrhaging millions of gallons a year into the soft earth beneath the National Mall. For decades, nobody fixed it.

America turns 250 this July. For a country that can’t agree on anything — especially about Donald Trump — what is reflected back isn’t always easy to look at.

‘It looks real good. And you know what, ‘scuse my French, but I f**king hate that.’

In preparation for the 250th celebration, the pool was drained, painted, and fenced off. It brought on lawsuits, court hearings, and more cable news segments than anyone expected from a paint job.

And then the water came back in. On June 4, the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool refilled under a blazing June